My Thoughts

Inside me rages a story wanting to come out,

boiling point is almost here

I think I've figured it out.
/

With every thought, and every dream willing to explore,

I think, and look, and see what experiences

will help me jump and soar.

/

Lurking things attempt to stop me and sometimes hold me there,

how can I then be free from this

old discusting snare?

/

I look for help and no one's there, have I done something wrong?

And yes I have, several times

and for it there's no happy song.

/

What then be there upon my mind that shelters me from fear?

Is it Angels, is it God?

What is it that lies in here?

/

My thoughts have unleashed a beautiful world, but will I stay protected?

What happens next? Will I come through?

will the good stay undetected?

/

Undetected from those dangers searching high and low,

for the victims who aren't looking

who fall upon a frigid snow.

/

Out of sight and out of mind does rarely work well

But out of sight and out of dangers

will keep me safe from hell.

/

I know that God is watching me, he will keep me safe and sound.

I believe in him, I know him

and his love speaks around.

If you have noticed the resemblance of the chapters ten and eleven of Anna, that is because there is a resemblance to them. I didn't realize that I was writing almost exactly the same thing. I have only just noticed it. So ignore it. Plus, chapter eleven is better than chapter ten. So just skip right to eleven. Sorry for the mishap.

Anna

CHAPTER TWELVE


We just lay there in silence cuddled close together in his room. His hand gently strokes my arm, my hand rubbing circles on his palm.
The TV is on, the only thing lighting up the room, colors bouncing off the walls. The sound fills the room yet I hear nothing. As if I have gone deaf from my own thoughts.
As we lie there in silence the thought of my mother lying in the hospital bed scares me. The thought of her helpless, the doctors keeping her alive for as long as is possible. I suddenly let out a small cry. I try to cover it up by laughing, but that would never be believable, especially since we are watching West Side Story. Conner presses his lips against my head and I feel like a child. The parent trying to comfort their daughter from the fears she has of the world. And it helps a little, but I feel like I will never feel completely comfortable without mom here. And though she's not 'gone', she is still gone. Gone from us.
As I lie like this with Conner I feel happy. I feel protected. I feel apreciated. I feel special. I feel... loved.

These are some words that go with my name

Meak

Amiable

Loving

Affectionate

Relaxed

Interesting

Educated

/

Delightful

Artistic

Warm hearted

Nurturing

/

Optomistic

Romantic

Responsible

Open

Caring

Kind